Five Sentence Fiction #23 – FORGOTTEN

What it’s all about: Five Sentence Fiction is about packing a powerful punch in a tiny fist. Each week the hostess will post a one word inspiration, then anyone wishing to participate will write a five sentence story based on the prompt word. The word does not have to appear in your five sentences, just use it for direction.

                                                     Dust motes danced and twirled in the light that filtered through a single bay window and onto the floor where a million shards of glass bore testimony to his shattered life…

"We have some unfinished business Slade," the familiar voice chilled him to the core, rendered him speechless, incapable of movement, and a low throaty chuckle spilled from the apparition which shimmered and floated in front of him.

"Impossible… I saw your body… they carried it… moved it to the side… blood… everywhere… it can't be," incomprehension reduced speech to a distinct mumble and he shook his head in disbelief, as if the action would somehow make the figure disappear.

"Deny it all you want," the ominous tone pierced his senses, "but THIS is the reminder!"

The glinting object thrust before his eyes shattered the remnants of his rational mind.

15 Comments

  1. Alex J. Cavanaugh on January 24, 2013 at 12:16 am

    Chilling! I take it he's now dead?

  2. Shelly on January 24, 2013 at 1:15 am

    Oooo… very good. So did the guy die or go insane?

    Hugs and chocolate.

    Did the book arrive yet?

     

  3. Ryan Derham on January 24, 2013 at 1:58 am

    Guilt can do that to someone. Well, he seems to have deserved it.

  4. Elise Fallson on January 24, 2013 at 9:47 am

    Oh that was chilling! I like the uncertainty at the end. Is he dead or has he gone mad….both would be intriguing… 😀

     

  5. tara tyler on January 24, 2013 at 12:02 pm

    a thriller in 5 sentences! great!

  6. Jemi Fraser on January 24, 2013 at 12:25 pm

    Oooo! Creepy – love it! Great atmosphere 🙂

  7. Nick Wilford on January 24, 2013 at 2:01 pm

    Ooh, that was spooky. I actually jumped at that last line. Great job!

  8. Lisa Shambrook on January 24, 2013 at 4:57 pm

    So much said in so few sentences and a very vivid exchange! As the others have said 'chilling'.

  9. jabblog on January 24, 2013 at 5:32 pm

    Chilling, indeed!

  10. Nas on January 24, 2013 at 7:45 pm

    Oh, thrilling and chilling! Well done!

  11. Susan Kane on January 24, 2013 at 8:48 pm

    Superb.  Five sentences can accomplish a lot.  THIS was great.

     

    The photo was perfect.  May I use it someday?

  12. Medeia Sharif on January 25, 2013 at 6:04 am

    A powerful, chilling piece. Great job. 

  13. michelle on January 25, 2013 at 10:39 am

    Thanks for the visits and wonderful comments! I appreciate it! 🙂

  14. Kay @ Short Story Ideas on February 16, 2013 at 8:07 am

    Oh, wow! I just stumbled across this. Love the idea of five sentence fiction – this story works brilliantly on its own but I can't help but hope you develop it further. 🙂

  15. Ginni Deville on April 25, 2016 at 10:06 pm

    Ooo eeire little interaction – love it

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