Five Sentence Fiction #2 – FOGGY

What it’s all about: Five Sentence Fiction is about packing a powerful punch in a tiny fist. Each week the hostess will post a one word inspiration, then anyone wishing to participate will write a five sentence story based on the prompt word. The word does not have to appear in your five sentences, just use it for direction.

                                              

 

Smoky, wispy tendrils curled round and round, this way and that, bathing the area in a soft glow of grayness.

Enveloped in this cocoon, the soft tones of a jazz melody from the radio blended with the pur of the engine.

Bobo, a golden German Shepherd, half asleep on the back seat, his characteristic one-eye opened and closed from time to time, settled down for the ride that had just begun.

As the vehicle negotiated the winding tree-lined road, the damp swirling vapour mounted, thickened, hovered above the ground, uncertain and directionless, and finally settled.

Monique shifted the gear, braced herself and, with a purpose borne of stubbornness, guided the vehicle along the treacherous path and into the murky depths of the mountain pass. 

32 Comments

  1. Elise Fallson on May 18, 2012 at 2:05 pm

    Very nice Mich, I liked the phrase, "with a purpose borne of stubbornness…" 
    I hope everyone has their seatbelt on, Bobo too. (:

    • michelle on May 19, 2012 at 10:21 am

      It's gonna be quite a ride————– 🙂

  2. Alex J. Cavanaugh on May 18, 2012 at 3:11 pm

    You are good at conveying so much in a scene with so few sentences!

    • michelle on May 19, 2012 at 10:55 am

      Thank you Ninja Captain! *salutes*

  3. injaynesworld on May 18, 2012 at 8:29 pm

    I agree with Elisa on that same sentence.   It tells us a lot about the character.   I have no doubt she will complete her journey safely.    Very nice job.

    • michelle on May 19, 2012 at 12:21 pm

      Thanks for popping in, Jayne. I thoroughly enjoyed your "morning after the night before…" version of foggy. Great punchline.

  4. Jocelyn Rish on May 18, 2012 at 10:43 pm

    Five sentence fiction sounds like fun! Great job setting the scene!

    • michelle on May 19, 2012 at 12:22 pm

      It's a great way to boost creativity! It also generates ideas for a longer piece… 🙂

  5. Sherry Ellis on May 18, 2012 at 11:45 pm

    I love your use of words.  They convey the scene beautifully.  Nice picture, too! 

    • michelle on May 19, 2012 at 12:23 pm

      Thanks Sherry. The picture is part of the prompt.

  6. Susan Kane on May 19, 2012 at 3:14 am

    Excellent!  The photo is intriguing.  Great job in 5 sentences.

    • michelle on May 19, 2012 at 12:24 pm

      The photo is beautiful… yes, definitely intriguing. Thanks!

  7. Rachna Chhabria on May 19, 2012 at 3:57 am

    You are super at this 5 sentence fiction. I loved the descriptions.
     
    Btw..finally managed to follow you via networked blogs 🙂
     

    • michelle on May 19, 2012 at 12:24 pm

      Thanks for a super comment! And for the follow! 🙂

  8. Sandra Crook on May 19, 2012 at 12:27 pm

    Good one.  If anyone is going to make it safely down the road, I think she will. 

  9. michelle on May 19, 2012 at 3:16 pm

    She definitely has the mindset to get her there…

  10. Catherine Noble on May 19, 2012 at 4:26 pm

    Lovely photo, Michelle! Bobo is such a cute name for a dog :') dark, smoky, windy roads give me the fear!

    • michelle on May 19, 2012 at 7:38 pm

      I battle with character names, so imagine trying to name a dog? I changed his name a few times before settling on Bobo… not sure if the name suits him, though…

  11. Robert on May 19, 2012 at 7:25 pm

    I like it Michelle … seems like a nice calming drive with a good friend along too … 
     
    Robert

    • michelle on May 19, 2012 at 7:40 pm

      Thanks for popping in, Robert. I appreciate the comment.

  12. mary aalgaard on May 19, 2012 at 9:54 pm

    You have the gift of inserting music into your writing. Excellent.

    • michelle on May 21, 2012 at 1:56 pm

      Thanks for the ***** comment!

  13. Stephanie on May 20, 2012 at 4:10 pm

    Ooooh…where is she going?

    • michelle on May 21, 2012 at 3:04 pm

      Ooooh… she first needs to make it through the mountains…

  14. Lisa Shambrook (@LastKrystallos) on May 21, 2012 at 1:09 pm

    Ooh, living in Wales, I've driven down many roads like that, so can relate! Great writing!

    • michelle on May 21, 2012 at 3:08 pm

      Sounds like a beautiful and relaxing drive (without the fog, of course)!

  15. Damyanti on May 22, 2012 at 4:25 am

    Lovely, Michelle!

  16. michelle on May 22, 2012 at 6:58 am

    Thanks for popping in, Damy! 🙂 🙂

  17. Rekha on May 22, 2012 at 6:45 pm

    And your's raced to the finish line with aplomb and grace. The ride was exhilirating as we journeyed along. 
     Maybe I should try this.

    • michelle on May 22, 2012 at 7:42 pm

      It's a great challenge, Rek – you should give it a go… 🙂

  18. Lillie McFerrin on May 24, 2012 at 5:13 pm

    That first sentence is perfect! Awesome job 🙂

  19. michelle on May 24, 2012 at 10:01 pm

    Thanks Lillie!  🙂 Five Sentence Fiction is a wonderful challenge!

Leave a Comment


Notice: Undefined variable: user_ID in /home/writerintrans/public_html/wp-content/themes/bb-theme/comments.php on line 69





Notice: ob_end_flush(): failed to send buffer of zlib output compression (0) in /home/writerintrans/public_html/wp-includes/functions.php on line 5427